Dear Americans

An open letter from Canada to the American people (the sane ones)

There’s another one.

I lay there quietly, trying to determine if what I was hearing on this early Saturday morning, in my half asleep state, was what I thought I was hearing.

Was that… nearby construction?
No, it’s too sustained and… sizeable.

Was that… a distant explosion?
Oh dear god… has the US invaded?

My heart raced. Panicked thoughts flashed through my mind.
What about my kids? Are they okay?
What do we do?
Where do we go?

I calmed myself with the reality that I’m surrounded by farmland — a highly unlikely location for a hostile invasion.

No, it was thunder.

Dear Americans,

This is how bad things have got.

The first real thunderstorm of spring has our Canadian minds racing to possible unprovoked US attacks.

That’s bonkers.
Worse, it’s abusive.

Canada’s relationship with the US has now become similar to a previously happy marriage where one spouse, perhaps after a brain injury, is suddenly now raising their hand as if to strike the other spouse but then retracting it… repeatedly.

The trust is gone.
Or at least in need of many years of repair.

Our future relationship will be, for the foreseeable, transactional at best.

That’s awful.
That’s awful and it’s down to one man.
It’s down to one morning-after-a-curry turd in a suit.

He is volatile, petulant, a poseur.
He is the world’s most dangerous joke.
If he weren’t so dangerous and surrounded by sycophants, he would be a hilarious train wreck.

I haven’t said his name and you know exactly who he is.

Things need to change. Fast.

Not just for our Canadian sanity, but for everything America has said it stands for.
Because, even though it may be hard for you to tell from where you are inside America, it is vividly apparent from the outside to the rest of the world that, the USA as we knew it… is imploding.

We can’t do anything about him but you can.
And don’t offer up “I didn’t vote for him.”
That’s like getting in a car driven by a drunk driver and saying “I didn’t want him to drive.”

We’re scared to walk on the sidewalk beside the road but…
You’re in the car and you’re going to crash. Badly.

Grab the wheel.

Love,
Canada

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